These Words Don't Mean A Thing

I was thinking about advertising successes and failures. The failures blame the medium. And sure, that can lead to failure. But more often than not, it's a mismatch between what is being said; and what actually happens. Ever find that if a person or a company tells you how good they are often enough, you actually start to believe it?! Oh sure, such unabashed self-proclamations can be extremely annoying and even off-putting at first, but eventually that annoyance turns comical, and then finally to acceptance! Yes, even the most strong-willed person usually buys in eventually. It's like the car crash we can't turn away from. I've noticed two things can happen at this point. If we're not paying full attention, we may actually blindly buy in. Come on - admit it - even you have marked X next to a politician's name without knowing anything about them other than some words on a sign. But if we pay enough attention and become a buyer - now we move forward presuming and hoping that what is being said, is actually what is being done. This is the critical point in time. If actions don't follow the spiel, we are NEVER coming back to the store; to the business; to the website; or to the vote. GONE! In the world of advertising upon which I've built my career, I see it everyday. Advertisers striving to get just the "right" message. Words on paper designed to drive traffic to their stores; their websites; and their businesses. And finally, they've got us. We the consumer, buy in. But what if our experience is not "great"; the value is not as promised; we are ignored; the "perfect" shopping experience is everything but. When the experience does not align to the promise, we are gone. Forever. And those words in the ad are wasted. More importantly, so are the dollars spent. Because we're not coming back.

Finally Friday

It's Friday, and there should be a glass (or a bottle) of wine in my near future. Kicked off the day with a new business call that went well. This is good as sales have been verrry slow! But, pitched a creative solution to the client that met his needs. Feels good. And we met in Starbucks, and they didn't let me down either after the week's earlier slip up. Even the annoying and obnoxiously loud construction taking place in our open atrium building seems to have stopped. Or the five Tylenol finally kicked in. Whatever - it's after 3p Friday. Signing off!

WTF

It occurred to me today that there were a number of small items pissing me off. I don't want this post to sound angry or bitter. I just want to vent so I can get on with my day and not pay my pissed off mood forward. These were my WTF moments that I'm sure we can all relate to:
   #5.  Starbucks personnel - if you drop the little sleeve that covers my paper cup on the floor - don't pick it up and put it on my cup. 
   #4.   Dear fellow Starbucks customer: If the creamer is empty; and you need some; oh - and I need some - don't just sit it on the counter empty. The SB person who dropped my sleeve on the floor would be happy to get us a new one. 
   #3. I love cyclists - I'm one of them. I don't ride when it's cold, but I appreciate the hardy (read crazy) cyclists who bundle up and ride all winter. But really - do you think you're going to win if we collide when you appear from nowhere right in front of my moving car?!? Especially when it's icy on the roads?! No. the answer is no.
  #2. And to the steroid induced muscle heads at my gym. I go there to stay reasonably petite. I will never be as big, bulky and strong as you. So really - must you leave five, six, and sometimes seven, 45 lb plates on the weight machines?! 
   #1 And my number 1 pet peeve for today.... Actually, I feel better. I'll leave this one for anyone reading this to fill in. 

This felt really good. I think I'll have many sequels to the WTF post!!
 

The Parking Ticket

Parking tickets. Let's face it - if you drive; you've got one. It's usually within the first 30 seconds that you don't pay for your parking. It's always unfair. But this time - it really was, so I fought it. I am registered online for Parkplus, so can simply call in the parking zone to activate a session. It works well - most of the time. Of course, the one time I left the office, forgot a file, ACTIVATED a session, and came out 15 minutes later to find the session didn't activate - is the time I got a ticket. I decided I must have done something wrong. Surely, it couldn't be the multi-million dollar electronic parking system! So I paid the $50.

But - a month later - in the exact same spot, and by running in to the office to pick up a file; and after activating a session, I got a ticket. Now, I had become ultra alert about the activation process, so I know it was activated. Solely on principle, I decided I would fight the system and take this to court. 

The letters I received from The City left me wondering if I might actually do hard time if found guilty. Would the death penalty be instated? Would I ever be allowed to see the light of day? You'd think I was a hardened criminal simply based on the language in the letter! 

Once the date was set, another letter followed to say that court was not in session that day due to a Judge's conference, so I should show up on or before the day in question to adjourn. UH??!! A lawyer friend didn't even understand what had happened. Was their court, or not?


To shorten the story, I went to court; on the day of the judge's conference. Turns out, a judge (one evidently not invited to the conference), two legal representatives (near grads) and four witnesses (we think) were present. But, I had taken my lawyer friend, so we were bumped to the top of the list; the case was reviewed before the judge entered the room, and it was withdrawn. Not exactly the triumphant "change the system" victory I'd envisioned. 

Did the City learn any lessons? Did the Parkplus system change? Definitely not. But, I sure enjoyed the bottle of wine I bought with my $75!!
 

Desperately Seeking Rebecca

Went to the spa - to relax. And get a facial. Left very unrelaxed, got an "express" facial - and an overall very bad experience.

Is it too much to expect semi-decent customer service? And should I (the customer) have to pay for the time spent solving a problem? Apparently - the answer is yes to both questions. Not cool.

My rant for the day. Friday - went for a facial. Oasis Spa. I'd booked 10 days early, and asked for Rebecca (as found in the computer as the person who last did my facial). Loved Rebecca. Arrived early - so I could relax. After an hour - Tamara (not Rebecca) came to give me my facial. Tamara was a large German woman who had the bedside manner of Military Bootcamp leader. So - I went to the front to explore the mix up. Simple question - what happened to Rebecca? The girl at the counter asked me to wait while she finished with another customer. This was understandable...until 15 minutes later when she finally turned her attention to me and said I could reschedule; or take what was left of my facial - 45 minutes. REALLY?! Those are my options?! And no apology for the mix-up; or for the fact that technically, I actually just got charged while she kept me waiting.

I won't go on about this further. It could have been addressed so easily - a nice explanation; reasonable options; perhaps assure me that Tamara was wonderful and would be happy to provide excellent service. Rebook with Rebecca at a discount. I would have smiled and told everyone how great Oasis Spas is. Instead, I'm writing this blog. One day - millions will read about it. Ok - at best - I feel better now.

Forever Young

Have you ever noticed that people we meet seem to stay the exact same age as the last time we saw them? I spoke with a former colleague from 10 years ago. At that time his kids were 13 and 8 years old. It was really strange to hear that the eldest had graduated from college! Seemed so young, but that same 13-year old was now 23. The years just hadn't passed in my mind.

Or - there's the former sweetheart that broke our heart. Years later you bump into the barely recognizable and out of shape body of what was once the old flame. Funny how fast that flame blows out!

Death has ensured the likes of Marilyn Munroe, John F Kennedy Jr, and Princess Diana are Forever young. Elizabeth Taylor was granted a long life, so our last memories are not of the glamourous beauty with violet eyes.

What memories do you want to leave friends and acquaintances with? Thank goodness for laser technology!

Halloween - what not to wear.

Halloween Day.

It's daytime - Halloween Day. Ah yes, a time to dress up! But what I witnessed was disconcerting: I wasn't entirely sure which outfits were costumes, and which were not.

Had I simply not notice that full blown western wear complete with hat, shiny silver belt buckles, and chaps is normal office attire? Oddly, I was not sure. So I explored some more.

My concerns grew. There were many "barely there" costumes. I guess for some, Halloween is a day to not dress up, but actually barely wear anything at all. There was the woman with pink through her hair, torn stockings, KISS-rock style 4" heeled boots, and a frilly pink and white skirt - that barely covered her, um, buttocks.

So I ask - can we really afford to be seen by our colleagues, bosses, and potential clients looking like a porn star? It's sort of like choosing to wear a Speedo at the beach. If you think you should, chances are, the rest of us think - no, you really shouldn't.